• straight couple: *make out in public at random intervals in weird places*
  • straight couple: *grabs each other's asses in public*
  • straight couple: *are not in any way inconspicuous about the fact that they are feeling each other up in public*
  • gay couple: *holds hands in public*
  • straight people: that is VILE and it is CORRUPTING my entire FAMILY. my grandmother is crying. my children have all shit their pants at the same time. WHO WILL THINK OF THE CHILDREN

soufflesandbowties:

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”

(via queensofthestoneage)

officialrichardnixon:

facts that cannot be disputed

  • ur cute as heck
  • ur very important
  • ur laugh is really cute oh my god
  • ur a perfect version of yourself

(via gravitysex)

supnikita:

do u ever feel like a tampon? needed at first but then soon replaced? 

(via gravitysex)

save-spock-and-roll:

when no one in class is ready for the test

image

(via supermoclel)

l-ibellule:

austin-n-oli:

Confession: I have a friend who likes to text me at like 4am when he’s had nightmares or he can’t sleep or he just needs a friend. He thinks I’m always awake at 4am but really I go to bed around 12am and I change his text-tone to the loudest one I have just so it wakes me up when he needs me.

you’re the kind of friend everyone needs

(via slapmytitties)